…volves our kids, our personal space or our workplace, we usually feel most comfortable and competent when things are ‘in order.’ The need for tidiness and organization is actually a need for control. This is not necessarily a bad thing. Those of you who read this column regularly know that I equate control with confidence and self-responsibility. Without it, the critical path leading to our goals and our happiness can be laden with wrong turns and… Continue reading →

…es not go away. It is suppressed, perhaps, but, when vacation time finally comes around, the resentment is set free. With no boss or co-workers to ‘take it out on,’ the anger is directed at other drivers (co-workers?) and authority, symbolized, in part, by traffic laws (the boss?). It’s most surely a rebellion against authority, but it’s a misplaced rebellion. People who feel that they have too little control over their lives need to address the i… Continue reading →

…ically produce the highest death rate per mile (USATODAY Health Spotlight: www.usatoday.com). Here at the beach, I observe more red lights ignored, more tailgating, more aggressive lane changes and more speeding than I ever see in large metropolitan areas. I even witnessed, with my own eyes, a driver waving a pistol at the occupants of a car next to him at a light here on Rt. 1. Do these people drive and behave like that at home? Maybe so, maybe n… Continue reading →

…onstructively improve oneself in the present. I address this throughout my latest book, “Bad Therapy, Good Therapy (And How to Tell the Difference),” available at www.DrHurd.com. Emotions can be slow and difficult to change, especially when they stem from previously absorbed irrational or false beliefs. In my view, my friend’s childhood years did not “form” him as such. He is not “damaged goods.” And hopefully, if he becomes a therapist, he won’t… Continue reading →

…leave the house, much less drive, shop or interact socially. The Obsessive Compulsive Foundation (www.ocfoundation.org) defines OCD as a neurobiological (physical) problem, as opposed to a psychological (mental) one. But they also acknowledge that no genetic or other link to physiology has yet been established. Whatever the cause, all obsessions involve out-of-control thoughts or impulses to do certain things over and over again. Compulsions are t… Continue reading →