I have a problem with the notion of, “It isn’t fair!” What exactly is “it”? Only individual people can be fair or unfair. You can say that Joe is unfair, or Suzie is unfair — but when you say “it” … Continue reading →

Nearly everyone says the key to working at home is dealing with the distractions. This can best be accomplished by having your own office/workspace, where everyone in the household understands while you’re at work, you’re at work. No interruptions, please, … Continue reading →

What’s the difference between fear and phobia? Fear is rational when you’re trying to uphold something valid, such as cleanliness or being organized. Fear is irrational when you’re primarily concerned with avoiding problems rather than upholding something positive. For example, … Continue reading →

Bitterness is an emotional state of resentment combined with anger. It’s usually chronic, in nature. A bitter person feels entitled to something he or she didn’t get — whether it’s a specific courtesy or something as unspecified as happiness. Bitterness … Continue reading →

Some people don’t like to be treated well. Why is this? There can be many reasons, depending on the exact psychology of the person who craves mistreatment. One reason is low self-worth, obviously. The form this takes is: “I’m not … Continue reading →

Realistic optimism consists of two parts. The first is that you face facts, at all times, and consider all relevant facts. The second is that you assume the positive is more powerful and more relevant than the negative. Even when … Continue reading →

You can try to escape choice, but you still cannot escape deciding. To decide not to make a choice is still to decide. So you might as well face it–and choose.

The issue isn’t whether to “get help” or to be independent. That’s a false choice. The issue is whether to help yourself, or to find someone to help you help yourself. Helping yourself is fine. But there’s nothing wrong with … Continue reading →

Do you define your work–or does your work define you? Your work is supposed to “work” for you. Ideally, it fulfills you and provides meaning and purpose for you, along with a good income. Worst case, it enables you to … Continue reading →

The last thing an individual — or a society — needs is a “guru.” Or a savior. Or someone to rescue them. The very notion implies one of the natural, inevitable human state as one of helplessness. “I’m helpless and … Continue reading →

Getting things done means you’re a doer. But it also implies that you’re a thinker. Sometimes, people who don’t get things done — even things they’re committed to doing, even small things — assume that the problem occurs because, “I … Continue reading →

Give yourself room to have a learning curve. Embrace your mistakes as corrections, and as indications of future success. Look at error as increased knowledge, and the pain from error simply as the cost that everything has. Make it all … Continue reading →