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Category: Psychology & Self-Improvement

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Authentic

Posted on October 30, 2009 by D3 Support

You cannot change other people. You don’t even have to change them, if you don’t like what they’re doing. All you have to do is make your own behavior consistent with what you think of them, and what you think … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

Subjective Secondary Gain

Posted on October 29, 2009 by D3 Support

There’s an old term in psychology called “secondary gain.” I prefer to call it “subjective secondary gain.” This refers to what you’re really getting out of something that is otherwise irrational. Another way I once heard it put was, “How … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

Of What Use Are the Manipulated?

Posted on October 26, 2009 by D3 Support

“Manipulative” people are ones who lie or imply their motives for doing something are other than what they are. It’s not effective to be manipulative. Manipulation only “works” to the degree that your victim is not paying attention. Yet think … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

No Short-Cut to Competence

Posted on October 19, 2009 by D3 Support

Hurrying is the alleged short-cut to competence. You don’t get an effective result by rushing. You get an effective result by being conscientious and accurate. More and more instances of doing something competently lead to greater and greater efficiency. But … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

Feeling “Used”

Posted on October 16, 2009 by D3 Support

Nobody wants to be used. But what does this term really mean? Some people say they’re being used merely because someone else gets something out of their personal encounter. But there’s nothing wrong with self-interest. Every encounter, whether business or … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

Passion and Drive

Posted on October 11, 2009 by D3 Support

A reader asks: What’s the difference, if any, between “passion” and “drive”? Passion is the emotional excitement one has over something. Drive is the motivation to get it done, along with a commitment to determining (and following through on) the … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

Fear and Fear Mongers

Posted on October 9, 2009 by D3 Support

A “fear monger” is someone who seeks to generate fear in you in order to gain control over you. “Control” can mean many different things. It can mean a sense of seeing you afraid, which makes a (sick) person happy. … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

Mental Health Labels Aren’t Kind

Posted on October 6, 2009 by D3 Support

I don’t see any point to labeling yourself with a psychiatric disorder. What does it do, other than imply that a mental state is something that happens “to” you rather than something that comes about because of a series of … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

Thinking, contd.

Posted on October 4, 2009 by D3 Support

A reader wrote in with the comment, in essence, that just because you think you’re thinking, doesn’t mean you’re thinking. This was in response to my column about the virtue and necessity of thinking (see The Glory of Thinking, Daily … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

The Glory of Thinking

Posted on September 30, 2009 by D3 Support

So many people don’t want to think — especially about personal concerns. Denial is the opposite of thinking. To most people, not thinking feels easy. But it’s not easy. Life is going on around you, whether you think about life … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

Psychological Disinfecting

Posted on September 29, 2009 by D3 Support

“Stop barging into my office and infecting me with your anxiety.” (Peggy Olson from the television series, Mad Men) This is a great quote. It illustrates how you can send both anxious people — and sometimes anxiety itself — on … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

The Method Makes It

Posted on September 28, 2009 by D3 Support

It’s not what you think that causes psychological distress so much as HOW you think. Ideally, as a child in school, you would have learned the laws of logic and reason. You would have learned them so well that you’d … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement
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