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Category: Psychology & Self-Improvement

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What’s Love Got to Do With Romance?

Posted on January 3, 2015 by DrHurd
A dozen red roses on a white background

In yesterday’s column, I wrote that love does not really require work — or the miserable sacrifices so many people claim. I received some interesting responses. One reader wrote: Good relationships require some self-sacrificial love. If the balance is off … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

“Good Relationships Take Constant Work”: Myth or Truth?

Posted on January 2, 2015 by DrHurd
Two red heart shaped balloons with sky background

Is your romantic relationship or marriage, on the whole, smooth and effortless? Or is there a constant sense of walking on eggshells, and trying not to offend the other? It’s a myth that good relationships take constant work. They don’t. … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

Being “Normal” Won’t Substitute Self-Esteem

Posted on January 1, 2015 by DrHurd

“Is this normal?” “Am I normal?” Psychotherapists hear this question all the time. The question is based upon a flawed premise and a flawed definition. Normal is not a substitute for “rational.” Normal refers to a statistical concept—essentially, to what … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

The Pros and Cons of First Impressions

Posted on December 27, 2014 by DrHurd

Changing negative first impressions is difficult. A person who forms a negative impression of another person will be less inclined to meet that person a second time because that person has been judged in a negative light. Without subsequent meetings, … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

Psychotherapists Can Change People: True or False?

Posted on December 23, 2014 by DrHurd

You can’t change others. Neither can a psychotherapist, no matter how competent or insightful. Isn’t it still possible to influence others, if not change them? Absolutely. But successful “influence” presupposes that somebody is open to being influenced. Or, more specifically: … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

Under Pressure: The Frantic Need to Keep Kids Busy

Posted on December 19, 2014 by DrHurd

Why do so many kids and their parents feel they have to fill every spare moment? Is it pressure to get into the top schools? Or is it worry that they’ll become couch potatoes or delinquents? My experience has shown … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

Why Integrity Matters in Your Personal Relationships

Posted on December 17, 2014 by DrHurd

Does integrity matter in romantic love? Without structural integrity, a building will collapse. A bridge without structural integrity will cause cars to plunge into the water. A ship without integrity will sink. A plane without integrity will fall out of … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

“I Can Quit Any Time I Want”

Posted on December 15, 2014 by DrHurd

The prevailing idea about addiction is that it’s not a choice, but an illness. By and large, this idea is promoted by the mental health industry, the prevailing academic establishment, organized religions and Alcoholics Anonymous/Narcotics Anonymous. Yet are they right? … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

Why Couples Fight Over Money

Posted on December 12, 2014 by DrHurd

Do you and your spouse argue over money? Perhaps you have heard of couples who find it helpful to have separate finances and bank accounts. What makes certain couples reach the decision to handle money in this way? Many reasons … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

“It’s a Jungle Out There” — Is Life Really Adversarial?

Posted on December 7, 2014 by DrHurd

Two approaches to life, especially in the business or professional environment, characterize most human interactions. The first is the adversarial mentality; the second is the realistic mentality. The adversarial mentality rests upon a series of illogical but (to some people) … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

The Addict’s Attempted Short-Cut to Happiness

Posted on December 4, 2014 by DrHurd

The addictive experience, according to drug and alcohol addiction expert Stanton Peele (see www.peele.net), is characterized as follows: 1. Powerful and all-encompassing; 2. Inspires a sense of well-being, such as through conveying an artificial sense of power or control; 3. … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement

“It’s Not What You Know; It’s WHO You Know” … Fact or Fiction?

Posted on November 30, 2014 by DrHurd

“It’s not what you know, it’s who you know.” So goes conventional wisdom. This statement summarizes the dominant idea underlying many of today’s widely acknowledged social and psychological problems. To place an emphasis on who you know instead of what … Continue reading →

Posted in Daily Dose of Reason, Psychology & Self-Improvement
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