One of the most common things people ask a psychotherapist like me about is motivation. “I should be doing such-and-such. But I’m not. I don’t feel motivated. Am I depressed?” Right there, in asking such a question, you’re revealing that … Continue reading
We basically have two ways of dealing with other human beings: reason, or force. This fact has social-political implications. But it also has implications for daily life in families, business or other personal relationships. To most of us, force is … Continue reading
Dear Dr. Hurd, My partner and I are good friends with another couple. (We’re both in lesbian relationships.) Recently, one of the women in that relationship started paying (what I believe to be) inappropriate attention to my girlfriend; sending personal … Continue reading
Emotional abuse is a fancy, clincial term for simply being mean. According to healthcentral.com [1/8/13], there are numerous indications you might be in an emotionally abusive relationship. Examples include: “Emotionally abusive spouses want you all to themselves. They do not … Continue reading
When dealing with someone younger — or older — many people mistakenly make age the primary factor. For example, “You’re younger than I am. You have no idea what I’m talking about.” Why does age have to be the primary … Continue reading
Dear Dr. Hurd, Everything seemed perfect when we first met 8 months ago. Now, my girlfriend is starting to get bossy and controlling. She interrupts me, finishes my sentences, and always seems to have a better way of doing everything. … Continue reading
A reader writes, “Thanks for your article on talking too much. You leave out one major thing: the nervous system. I talk too much sometimes because I am jumpy and nervous because of anxiety in certain social situations. It’s an … Continue reading
Dear Dr. Hurd, I’ll get to the point. I can’t get past my anger toward my mother. My husband and I decided never to have children. Though I’ve long since informed her of this, she never misses a chance to … Continue reading
A reader writes: Although sensitivity is usually considered a desirable trait, I find it a hindrance. It’s very embarrassing when in a professional setting my normally stoical exterior is temporarily interrupted by a critical remark that reveals my sensitivity. I … Continue reading
For two decades now, I’ve been hammering away at and questioning the very concept of the alleged disease of “Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder.” Now there’s a neurologist with over 50 years of experience asking some of the very same questions. … Continue reading
Like most people where I live, I am a mid-life transplant from a big city / metropolitan area to a small town, three hours from any major city. Most of my peers have made the comment, “People in this small … Continue reading
A lot of people assume, “I don’t think like a victim. I’m rational, self-responsible and don’t think anyone owes me a living. Victim-think only afflicts those who feel entitled, or who are otherwise irrational.” Not so. Victim-think is a psychological … Continue reading