Dear Dr. Hurd: I recently discovered that I have had a serious flaw in my thinking my entire life. Today I read an article of yours I really liked on Capitalism Magazine’s website called: ‘Fear: The Great Inhibitor.’ As you … Continue reading
‘I’m really worried about you.’ On the surface, it seems like a caring and considerate statement. And sometimes, it possibly is. But a lot of the time, people are annoyed when someone says it to them. They don’t know why … Continue reading
Some object to the idea of therapy or life coaching by email, Internet, Skype or telephone. The basis for the objections is almost always something like this: patients improve most in a strong relationship with a therapist experienced at reading … Continue reading
The most important thing for a parent to remember is to teach his or her child to think. A reader once wrote me a note in which she elaborated on how she teaches her child to think in all kinds … Continue reading
Dear Dr. Hurd: I would be interested, if you would like, to hear your thoughts on how and why people are so drawn to conspiracy theories, and why they react so negatively to being asked for proof. Dr. Hurd’s reply: … Continue reading
People sometimes ask: “How much do you blame your parents for your problems in the present, arising from childhood?” All I can reply is: Hold your parents accountable for anything wrong they said or did. But hold yourself accountable for … Continue reading
Dear Dr. Hurd: I agree with today’s Daily Dose of Reason (see 1/1/13), but–because we have no choice in being born with an inborn fear, there always has been and always will be religion/supernaturalism. Dr. Hurd’s reply: Actually, there is … Continue reading
Conclusion of yesterday’s column: Reporter: I think lots of people confuse happiness with fun, and the dangers there are obvious. People who are always looking for that moment-to-moment ‘high’ are, it seems to me, far less likely to find long-term … Continue reading
Dr. Hurd recently engaged in a discussion with a journalist about issues related to happiness, self-esteem, psychology, self-help, and much more. What follows are some excerpts from that discussion: Reporter: It seems to me that we have a fundamental confusion … Continue reading
One of the most annoying qualities a person can display is smugness. Smugness distinguishes itself from confidence in that it’s based on the unearned and undeserved, rather than the honestly achieved. As a result, smugness is pretentious and self-conscious, while … Continue reading
Conclusion of yesterday’s columnHow to Act During a Breakup Learn—or relearn—the value of scheduling your personal life. When you were married or coupled, you defaulted to the relationship. You did what you wanted to do together, sometimes scheduled and sometimes … Continue reading
Everyone knows that breaking up is hard to do. But few know how to do it right. What behaviors are rational under the difficult circumstances of a breakup? And what sort of thinking is required to make it possible to … Continue reading