“Discussions are always better than arguments, because an argument is to find out WHO is right and a discussion is to find out WHAT is right.” I don’t know who said this. But it’s far more profound and accurate than … Continue reading
Q: Would you offer your observations and some action people can take to stay calm, rational and effective in stressful and emotional interpersonal situations? I think many people lack these tools. I consider myself very learned in this area and … Continue reading
The Obesity Action Coalition — yes, there is such a thing — states that fat jokes “remain a socially acceptable form of prejudice in American society.” This “weight stigma” is what leads to chronic obesity. So, in OAC’s assessment, what … Continue reading
“Too many people think of happiness as something over which they have no control, but that isn’t true. Ironically, it’s people’s definition of and expectations for happiness that undermine their own. The best shot anyone has of being happy—in any … Continue reading
Dear Dr. Hurd: We are always encouraged to “be positive,” because it is bad to be negative. However, there are many things in life that are inherently negative, such as what has happened to America over the past 8 years … Continue reading
A therapist at Psychology Today online writes, People often ask me how I think human beings are changing as a result of our addiction to technology. The fact is we are changing in innumerable ways but perhaps none more profound … Continue reading
“Once we start lying, the extent of our dishonesty increases over time. And when that happens, our brain begins to tamp down its emotional response to our own immoral behavior, signaling in effect that lying is no big deal. That … Continue reading
A reader asks: “Trust your gut.” What the heck does that even mean? People seem to be saying this more and more. Does my gut have a brain? The way I think of this is your gut is an automated … Continue reading
Psychological therapy does not change people. People either change themselves or, more often, they do not change. But when anything changes, it’s all the changed individual’s doing. Talk to any former drug addict, to dramatize the point. That former drug … Continue reading
It takes more than intelligence to avoid a toxic relationship. As Kristen Fuller, M.D., writes: “I myself had all the tools to avoid a toxic relationship, but I entered into an emotionally and mentally toxic relationship with someone who seemed … Continue reading
Thanksgiving means giving thanks. Thanks to whom? There’s the rub. If you look gratitude up in the dictionary you’ll find: the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness: “she expressed her gratitude to the … Continue reading
A reader asks if I have any insights into the post-election hysteria, i.e., melting down and having to grieve because Hillary Clinton lost. And the assassination threats on social media. And the verbal, even physical, bullying of people suspected to have … Continue reading