If you don’t put yourself first, others in your life will put themselves first … and you will then be last on your own list. Putting yourself first is not “childish” or “selfish.” It’s actually the mature, responsible and reality-oriented … Continue reading
Category: Psychology & Self-Improvement
Worse Than Single?
Healthy individuals need each other but not in the same respect as unhealthy ones. Healthy individuals experience need in the sense that they would rather have a healthy relationship than have none at all. But they do not fall into … Continue reading
Do It, Then Forget It
Problems with procrastination? Stop thinking and talking about it. Start the day with ONE thing you have been putting off. Get that one thing done. Then forget about what you have been putting off. Dwelling on what you put off … Continue reading
Small Town Business
After living in a city for most of my life, I recently moved to a small town. One of the most common complaints you hear in a small town is: “Everybody knows your business.” It’s a widespread feeling, but it’s … Continue reading
Emotional Interpretation
Usually the term “interpretation” is thought of as a conscious, somewhat intellectual process. However, we all “auto-interpret.” Automatic interpretations refer to the reasoning that takes place in our minds on the split-second, often very emotional level. This is the level … Continue reading
Opinions are Ideas
To criticize someone for being “opinionated” is like criticizing someone for “breathing too much.” Opinions are the byproduct of ideas. To be without ideas is not a virtue. It’s the CONTENT of one’s ideas that counts. It’s a copout to … Continue reading
Errors Allowed
Q: I feel paralyzed by the thought of making a decision and being wrong, or coming to a conclusion and being wrong. What’s up with me? A: You fear error because an error, to you, means damnation of you forever. … Continue reading
Knowledge is Worth Understanding
I heard a statement recently that went like this: “Don’t tell me steps 1 through 10 … Just tell me step 10.” Now THERE’S an example of the anti-conceptual, anti-thinking mentality at work. The person who said this assumes that … Continue reading
People Who Can’t Tolerate Disagreement
Do you know someone who cannot tolerate dissension or disagreement? It can be in the context of political or philosophical views, more day-to-day concerns — or both. The inability to tolerate dissension is a confession that one’s viewpoint was formed … Continue reading
Magical Thinking
Magical thinking is a term associated with mental illness and schizophrenia. It refers to the insane person’s completely false and delusional beliefs that make no logical sense whatsoever. But magical thinking is something a lot of people suffer from, to … Continue reading
When Talking Helps
Does talking help? Sometimes yes, sometimes no. Sometimes, talking is worrying. Worrying accomplishes nothing, although it raises blood pressure and tension. Sometimes talking is: planning; thinking; developing a rational, or more positive, perspective. Talking in and of itself is neither … Continue reading
Self-Deceit is the Worst Deceit
Most of all, don’t believe your own B.S. Your mind might create illogical conclusions based upon illogical assumptions. It happens subconsciously. It’s outside of your awareness–but not outside of your control. That which you can identify and change is always, … Continue reading