You’re not entitled to success. How do I know this? Because there’s nobody doing the entitling. Success is not the result of some unseen Santa Claus giving it away. Success comes from effort, but it also comes from other things. … Continue reading
Dear Dr. Hurd: My wife and I argue a lot. It seems destructive in some ways. But we do make up in the end. I sometimes wonder if arguing is the only constructive way to solve problems. What do you … Continue reading
A therapist is not your doctor; a therapist is your guide. A therapist does not “do” something “to” you to make you better. A therapist goes with you–sometimes advising, sometimes guiding, sometimes simply being there. A therapist is not your … Continue reading
A friend is someone who, by definition, gives you benefit because of who he or she is. It’s not a tangible benefit — such as money, or property. A tangible benefit arises in a business transaction, not in a friendship … Continue reading
There are two kinds of people perceived as “bossy.” The first really means well. He wants to see something done right, and he’s objective in his approach. He looks at facts and determines what makes most sense. He actually is … Continue reading
Time is often our enemy. But why? Time is simply a measurement of reality. Reality is not an enemy, not to a reasonable person. The problem is that most of us have more priorities than time. The existence of time … Continue reading
Finding out “why” you do something isn’t always the answer. Sometimes the issue is more one of making a commitment — to live your life in a better way. I have talked for years about the need for all of … Continue reading
People are not “born with” superior abilities. At most, people are born with superior predispositions to abilities. These predispositions consist of whatever makes one brain, or one set of limbs, superior to another. But “ability” refers to more than the … Continue reading
Nobody gets in our way; we get in our own way. Even when there are external obstacles, the challenge becomes getting around those obstacles. We do that through thinking. Thinking is something that nobody can stop us from doing. Nobody, … Continue reading
If you don’t put yourself first, others in your life will put themselves first … and you will then be last on your own list. Putting yourself first is not “childish” or “selfish.” It’s actually the mature, responsible and reality-oriented … Continue reading
Healthy individuals need each other but not in the same respect as unhealthy ones. Healthy individuals experience need in the sense that they would rather have a healthy relationship than have none at all. But they do not fall into … Continue reading
Problems with procrastination? Stop thinking and talking about it. Start the day with ONE thing you have been putting off. Get that one thing done. Then forget about what you have been putting off. Dwelling on what you put off … Continue reading