In psychological theory, there is something called the ‘ideal self.’ A person is thought to hold, consciously or subconsciously, a view of the person he’s supposed to be. If the ideal is rational, there’s no serious problem with this, but … Continue reading
Don’t worry about what others say or think. You know what your track record is — good or bad. You were there.
Will the truth set you free? Absolutely. If something really is true, it’s part of reality. You’re much better off in contact with reality than not. If you’re ignorant, knowing what’s true sets you free to be knowledgable. If you’re … Continue reading
Several people wrote and asked me if there are ways to battle “seasonal affective disorder” (SAD) either mentally or cognitively, as opposed to biochemically. My answer is yes, it is definitely worth a try. If you find that you get … Continue reading
Many people have a false idea that the end of a relationship, or a divorce, is a “failure.” It isn’t, necessarily. All that it really means is that the two members of the relationship no longer satisfy each other. Failure … Continue reading
Intelligence is the ability to think in terms of abstract concepts, as opposed to merely perceiving persons, places and things. Brilliance is when those abstract concepts prove to be true.
To be “thankful” means to have something to cheer, or to celebrate. In order to have something to celebrate, you first have to embrace life. Embracing life is not just a wish, but an ongoing rational task requiring effort and … Continue reading
Anxiety (when it’s not rational) is usually the result of insufficient self-esteem. Self-esteem consists of two parts: Self-efficacy and self-worth. Self-efficacy refers to the view that one is competent, and self-worth refers to the view that one deserves the results of one’s … Continue reading
“Why is he acting this way?” “Why does she do that?” Most people, I find, ask these questions all the time. Therapists get asked this question a lot. My answer is always the same: “He has his reasons.” People do … Continue reading
When in personal conflict, try to remember: The issue isn’t “who’s right?” The issue is “What’s right?” Objective reality, established through the use of facts and reason, is the goal here. Of course we all want to be right. But … Continue reading
The release of tension is not the same as the affirmation of values. When you release tension, you’re clearing the way but you’re not creating anything. Often, affirming or experiencing positive values makes tension go away. People constantly looking for … Continue reading
“It is useless to attempt to reason a man out of a thing he never reasoned into.” — Jonathan Swift How true! People who don’t reach their conclusions via reason are not going to listen to reason. People don’t become … Continue reading