Dear Dr. Hurd: My first wife and I had two wonderful children together. When they were young she wanted to be divorced. I objected and agreed to go to a counselor. The counselor’s position was, “If it makes you happy, … Continue reading
An excerpt from my recent book, ‘Bad Therapy, Good Therapy: And How to Tell the Difference’: The following statement illustrates the viewpoint of a person influenced by a deterministic, victim-oriented therapist: ‘My mother preached to me. My father beat me. … Continue reading
A DrHurd.com reader asks for my thoughts on the following: A new University of Wisconsin-Madison imaging study shows the brains of people with generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) have weaker connections between a brain structure that controls emotional response and the … Continue reading
I use philosophy in daily life, and I use philosophy while being a therapist. First, let me define what I mean by philosophy. Philosophy has five branches: Metaphysics — In other words, “What is it?” Epistemology — In other words, … Continue reading
Awhile back, I read an article at MSNBC.com about a study for antidepressant drug research. The main thrust of the article was how some participants who were given placebos (instead of the genuine drugs) actually improved and felt better. While … Continue reading
Dear Dr. Hurd, I have been married to my husband for almost 18 years. He is not very communicative, somewhat blunt and not very trusting of anyone. He is quite well off and has always provided a very comfortable life … Continue reading
A slogan reads: ‘Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.’ It’s a provocative statement. But it’s true. Who can identify why it’s true? First, let’s define self-esteem. Self-esteem means a pervasive sense that one is worthy of existence, and … Continue reading
People talk about “self-esteem” as if it’s something you purchase at the store, or are lucky enough to win in the lottery. Some people become depressed that they never “get it.” Others look to external agents — healthy things, such … Continue reading
I ran across a quote recently: ‘Those who know the least, know it the loudest.’ I don’t know the author of the quote. But it says a lot. ‘Loud,’ in this context, means: unthinking, or shrill. It doesn’t mean strong … Continue reading
Dear Dr. Hurd,I’m a substitute teacher and I go from school to school. When kids see a sub they think it is a free day. I know there are ways to defuse situations but I’m having a problem with voice … Continue reading
Dear Dr. Hurd: I am having a difficult time understanding the actions of my brother’s former girlfriend, who is also the mother of his 3-year-old son. When she says my brother can have him on a particular day, she always … Continue reading
Two common issues getting a lot of people into psychological (and interpersonal) trouble: 1) They don’t pay attention. 2) They ask others to solve something they’re actually able to solve themselves. Our culture is drowning in the notion of “attention … Continue reading