A reader writes: My husband and I have been together for 17 years. I gained some weight over the last few years and our physical relationship became almost nonexistent. We are still very close; we cuddle and say nice things, … Continue reading
Category: Psychology & Self-Improvement
The Hazards of Unsolicited Advice-Giving
A reader writes: What does it say about a person who is prone to offering others unsolicited advice without a polite prompting of the shift of conversation? And why would the object of that unsolicited advice be understandably offended when … Continue reading
Hair Loss and Emotions
Dear Dr. Hurd, I need advice on what to say to my husband of more than 10 years. He is in a complete snit because he’s starting to lose his hair. I couldn’t care less, and frankly I think he … Continue reading
The # 1 Reason So Many People Lie
Some people lie in order to gain something for nothing. The “gain” consists of money, property or respect from others. However, most people who lie don’t do so for this reason. Most people who lie do so out of fear. … Continue reading
Politics and Professional Helpers
A reader asks, “What happens if a client you see for personal help doesn’t agree with you on politics?” Psychotherapy isn’t about politics. So there’s no need to ever discuss it, not in sessions. However, politics is a branch of … Continue reading
Who’s the Boss in Your Relationship?
Dear Dr. Hurd, Everything seemed perfect when we first met 8 months ago. Now, my girlfriend is starting to get bossy and controlling. She interrupts me, finishes my sentences, and always seems to have a better way of doing everything. … Continue reading
Feelings: NOT What Make Us Human
A lot of times, people are looking for a “quick fix” to their problems, particularly emotional/behavioral or relationship problems. The common response is, “You can’t always have a quick fix. Life is a process, and problem-solving can take time.” This … Continue reading
Spending and Love
Dear Dr. Hurd: First of all I greatly enjoy reading your columns since what you write is like my unexpressed thoughts put into words! With that out of the way… My boyfriend of two years has just moved in with … Continue reading
Maybe What You Need is a Good … Failure!?
A reader writes with the following quote: “Have you ever considered that your biggest problem is that you haven’t failed ENOUGH?” (Matt Hussey) He writes: I like what this implies. Not enough risk taking toward value obtainment and missing your … Continue reading
“Is Something Bothering You?”
Question from a reader: If you sense something is bothering your partner or friend, whose responsibility is it to initiate dialogue? The person who is upset or the person who is sensing something? The person who is bothered is responsible, … Continue reading
“Will You Please Lie for Me?”
Dear Dr. Hurd: I‘ve been put in a very uncomfortable position by my best friend’s girlfriend. Right out of nowhere, she tried to sell me … shall we say … an illegal substance. Not the end of the world, I … Continue reading
One Major Reason Not to Hate Your Boss
According to a study done by LinkedIn.com, the # 1 reason that three-quarters of employees dislike or hate their jobs is … the boss. If you dislike your boss because your boss has undesirable characteristics, that’s fine. But if you … Continue reading