Perhaps the biggest problem in most personal or business relationships? The false belief that there’s a conflict of interest, when there isn’t. When personal relationships degenerate into unhappiness, you’ll almost always find an adversarial mindset. Therapists who work with couples … Continue reading
“Detach With Love” is a concept people with drug or alcohol-addicted loved ones learn to apply, for their own sanity if nothing else. Fran Simone, Ph.D., writing at psychologytoday.com [6-5-15]: For years, I struggled to control my adult son’s substance … Continue reading
A friend and reader of mine asks: I’m accepting of people’s sexuality, but Bruce Jenner… There’s something psychologically off with him, right? He revealed his new self today, and it just seems fishy to me. I don’t believe he’s actually … Continue reading
A Wisconsin woman is looking for answers after she said Southwest Airlines refused to let her use her cellphone to make a call that could have saved her husband’s life. On April 3, Karen Momsen-Evers was flying back to Milwaukee … Continue reading
We’ve all heard (or told ourselves) how it’s wrong to make excuses. However, we don’t usually focus on why it’s bad for ourselves to make excuses. Usually, the unspoken implication is: “Well, excuses would be nice for me; but I … Continue reading
The following is an excerpt from my book, Bad Therapy Good Therapy (And How to Tell the Difference), available for sale on this site, and elsewhere. Case Example of an Arbitrary Assertion Joe and Melissa have been married for sixteen … Continue reading
Psychologically, people tend to struggle with a false alternative. On the one side, they bottle up their feelings. On the other side, they express their feelings, but in an indiscriminate way. Mental health professionals have largely failed their patients/clients in … Continue reading
A very good article published by Ronald Riggio, Ph.D., at psychologytoday.com challenges the idea that first born children usually end up high achievers. Riggio states, It is important to also note that when we rely on our own experience, we … Continue reading
Wise words from an article on the psychology of complaining at psychologytoday.com: If you decide you want to lodge a complaint, make a plan, says Winch. First, determine exactly what you want to achieve (don’t let someone else pick a … Continue reading
A reader writes: Dear Dr. Hurd: A persistent problem I’ve had is why on earth people (and a lot of them) think that if they know a person, somehow that person’s bad behavior is exempt from moral condemnation. For example, … Continue reading
A psychology student writes with the following questions: “What is your opinion on escapism, i.e., the act of escaping everyday stress through fantasy and entertainment? Is it a healthy way to relieve stress?” Dr. Hurd replies: The term “escapism” usually … Continue reading
Following an article I wrote about marriage, a reader commented on Facebook: Marriage requires an enduring commitment, selflessness (dedication to something other than oneself), and a well-developed sense of humor, among other attributes. Selfish people rarely make it work….” Another … Continue reading