How often have we heard — or even said, ‘I need a drink! I’ve had a hard day. I need a nice big meal — or a cigarette!’ In the face of stress, it can be tempting to ‘self-medicate’ with … Continue reading →

Are you a snob? Do you know one? What, exactly, is a snob? In order to know that, we first have to explore why people achieve success. There are two kinds of achievers out there. The first does it for … Continue reading →

I’ve always liked the saying, ‘If it were easy, everybody would be doing it.’ Sadly, the natural response to that is often, ‘Well, it must be nice to have” whatever you earned that they resent your having earned. A successful … Continue reading →

I speak to so many people — married couples, families, friends — who tell me they fight over money more than anything else. But after digging a little deeper, it becomes evident that the fighting is less about actual money … Continue reading →

Noted educator Maria Montessori once said, “Never help a child with a task at which he feels he can succeed.’ This beautiful statement has many implications for children and for education in general. I’d like to generalize a bit more … Continue reading →

A website visitor writes, ‘I have a friend who projects her shortcomings and personality faults onto others; holding them accountable for those actions or inactions. For example, she’s always late, yet she expresses anger when others are late. Why does … Continue reading →

Clients sometimes describe a spouse, family member or friend as ‘contrary.’ In other words, this person constantly disagrees just for the sake of disagreeing. Such a person is often referred to as a ‘rationalist’ (though ‘annoying’ is a good alternative). … Continue reading →

Occasionally a client will look back over the holidays and admit to me that interactions with family, grown children, aging parents and old friends were often tinged with one, common feeling: Guilt. In spite of all the jokes (‘What? You … Continue reading →

The holidays can be an opportunity to reconnect with children who’ve been living away from home — many for the first time. Although it’s reasonable to expect it to be a happy experience, it can be full of challenges as … Continue reading →

After two of the biggest holidays of the year, it seemed kind of silly to write a column about smiling. But after doing what I do for 25 years, I am well aware that not everybody is jolly over the … Continue reading →

Around this time of year, some people make themselves sad by dwelling on ‘what could have been.’ What a profound waste of time! Let’s say that you spend just 10 minutes a day thinking about the things you wished you … Continue reading →

It’s a proven fact that champagne, eggnog and cocktail wieners can combine to produce some pretty outlandish New Year’s resolutions. ‘Say what you mean and mean what you say’ doesn’t seem to matter as much when you’re balancing a lampshade … Continue reading →