Dear Dr. Hurd, I’ve been depressed for a while now. My doctor wrote me a prescription, and says my depression is a disease. But I feel that the problem is more emotional than medical. I hate the way the pills … Continue reading →

Dear Dr. Hurd, I read your column every week, and I like what you say. But sometimes, when I try to make suggestions to my husband or my adult children, it turns into an unpleasant ‘heated discussion.’ I am truly … Continue reading →

Few things are more annoying than being nagged (except perhaps being accused of it). Nagging comes from anxiety over the false belief that repetition creates motivation. It never does, and in fact, it lowers respect and reveals weakness by implying, … Continue reading →

How often have we heard — or even said, ‘I need a drink! I’ve had a hard day. I need a nice big meal — or a cigarette!’ In the face of stress, it can be tempting to ‘self-medicate’ with … Continue reading →

Are you a snob? Do you know one? What, exactly, is a snob? In order to know that, we first have to explore why people achieve success. There are two kinds of achievers out there. The first does it for … Continue reading →

I’ve always liked the saying, ‘If it were easy, everybody would be doing it.’ Sadly, the natural response to that is often, ‘Well, it must be nice to have” whatever you earned that they resent your having earned. A successful … Continue reading →

I speak to so many people — married couples, families, friends — who tell me they fight over money more than anything else. But after digging a little deeper, it becomes evident that the fighting is less about actual money … Continue reading →

Noted educator Maria Montessori once said, “Never help a child with a task at which he feels he can succeed.’ This beautiful statement has many implications for children and for education in general. I’d like to generalize a bit more … Continue reading →

A website visitor writes, ‘I have a friend who projects her shortcomings and personality faults onto others; holding them accountable for those actions or inactions. For example, she’s always late, yet she expresses anger when others are late. Why does … Continue reading →

Clients sometimes describe a spouse, family member or friend as ‘contrary.’ In other words, this person constantly disagrees just for the sake of disagreeing. Such a person is often referred to as a ‘rationalist’ (though ‘annoying’ is a good alternative). … Continue reading →

Occasionally a client will look back over the holidays and admit to me that interactions with family, grown children, aging parents and old friends were often tinged with one, common feeling: Guilt. In spite of all the jokes (‘What? You … Continue reading →

The holidays can be an opportunity to reconnect with children who’ve been living away from home — many for the first time. Although it’s reasonable to expect it to be a happy experience, it can be full of challenges as … Continue reading →