Q: Mommy, why is it wrong to be selfish and right to always share? Wrong answer: Because it’s not nice. You should care for other people and be sensitive to their needs. Right answer: It’s best to ignore the word … Continue reading
Category: Psychology & Self-Improvement
Bad Habits: The New Term for Addiction
Q: I enjoyed your article on the hazards of perfectionism. With respect to food, I personally find that once I start binging or eating one of the “banned foods” I just keep at it. Because I’ve already “failed” so why … Continue reading
Why Some Therapist-Client Relationships Are Sick
The following is an excerpt from Dr. Hurd’s new book, Bad Therapy, Good Therapy (And How to Tell the Difference). The book is available in Kindle e-book format through Amazon.com, and autographed copies may be purchased at this web site. One … Continue reading
Facts Always Come First
A reader wrote in and asked, “Can history be objective? Or will any rendering of history be tainted by the historian’s personal perspective?” Actually, history can and must be objective. But it has to be fact-based. And then, once facts … Continue reading
Why People Want What They Cannot Have
A reader wrote in and asked, “Why is what you cannot have often more appealing than what you can have?” Wanting what you cannot have is the easy way out. For some, fantasy is preferable to putting the work into … Continue reading
Does Having Problems Automatically Make You Nice?
You often hear people say things like, “That Joe. He has problems. But he can be quite a jerk, too, Is that it — or does he have problems?” My question is: Why not both? You have to understand something. … Continue reading
Help: I’m Talking and I Can’t Shut Up!
Dear Dr. Hurd: I consider myself a compulsive talker. A talker that gets myself into trouble. For me it’s not so much an inadaquency as some kind of crazy need to say something or answer someone when an answer is … Continue reading
A Conversation Between Irrational Anxiety and Reason
Anxiety: You cannot take a risk. It’s too painful. What if your risk doesn’t work out? Reason: You’ll be no worse off than before you started. Anxiety: But you’ll feel badly. Reason: Won’t you feel badly if you don’t try … Continue reading
The “Pleasure” of Being a Victim
It’s wrong and irrational to pretend that you’re a victim when you’re not; but it also serves an emotional purpose, for many people. By “emotional” I mean irrational. It’s not that emotions are always mistaken or irrational, but in this … Continue reading
Success and Failure
A successful person is not someone who wakes up one day and has a brilliant idea, immediately implements the idea — and enjoys massive success, just like that. Great ideas do sometimes come on suddenly, although usually they do not. … Continue reading
Review of Dr. Hurd’s New Book, Bad Therapy, Good Therapy: And How to Tell the Difference
Author Alexandra York’s review of Dr. Hurd’s new book: Dr. Hurd begins this very important, very serious book by making us laugh. Taking a hypothetical patient with a problem to seven different therapists and giving us seven different opinions on … Continue reading
The Self-Flattery of “Addiction Treatment” Specialists
Is addiction a choice? The controversy continues. One reader writes in to DrHurd.com the following: “I have done more than average investigation into the concept of addiction. I believe there can be multiple causes, both biological and psychological. This is … Continue reading