I often hear of people who say, ‘I don’t believe in therapy.’ The premise of the statement is that therapy requires uncritical belief. This may be true of other things, but it’s not true of therapy. You can see for … Continue reading
A reader writes in about what a friend of his had to say about emotions and reason: ‘My conversation partner stated, ‘An emotion is independent of reason. While it might come from a value judgment or past experience, it occurs … Continue reading
Dear Dr. Hurd, A few weeks ago my wife returned home from the hospital after a serious surgical procedure. My wife and I are happy that she is making a swift recovery but there is one thing that has got … Continue reading
Dear Dr. Hurd: I’ve been living with my girlfriend for several years. There is not a fight or disagreement between us that she doesn’t tell her friends about. Nothing is private between us, and I’ve actually stopped confiding in her … Continue reading
Dear Dr. Hurd: My boyfriend and I have been living together for 8 years. Overall, we’re happy (or at least I thought we were). A couple of months ago he started seeing a therapist. I have no idea why. Now, … Continue reading
Sometimes people say, “I won’t have any expectations. That way, I won’t be disappointed.” Is this even possible? Actually, this is not a healthy approach. The reason is: You have expectations whether you want to think so, or not. If … Continue reading
Job security. Health security. Social Security. Security, security, security … Conventional wisdom to the contrary, “security” does not mean the absence of conflict, work or pain. Psychologically, security refers to an emotional state of competence, freedom-worship, and confidence that one … Continue reading
Dear Dr. Hurd, So much is said, especially in religion, about honoring your parents . What if a parent does not honor their child? My mother makes it a point to embarrass and humiliate me in front of friends and … Continue reading
Dear Dr. Hurd, After a particularly alcohol-filled weekend on the town, my girlfriend and I decided that we would attend AA in our hometown. We don’t have a huge problem, but we need to learn how to moderate. It’s been … Continue reading
Dear Dr. Hurd, My boyfriend and I have been living together for several years. Long story short, I’m beginning to suspect he’s either seeing somebody else, or “hooking up” with someone else behind my back. He’s pulling away from me, … Continue reading
Dear Dr. Hurd, My husband and I live in a resort/beach area. We moved here for an early retirement, and overall love it. For some reason, he now feels like we have to play ‘bed and breakfast’ to any and … Continue reading
It’s possible to be in a committed relationship, while still remaining independent. Independence means you know who you are, what you wish to do in life, and why. You don’t expect or demand the person you’re in a relationship with … Continue reading