Serenity now … Serenity how? When you experience an emotion, identify the emotion (to yourself). “I feel [insert emotion here].” But don’t blame the cause of the emotion on some person, situation or thing. In other words: Do not say, … Continue reading
Interesting fact: The head of the student counseling department at Boston College recently sent the following email to his faculty: “I have done a considerable amount of reading and research in recent months on the topic of resilience in college … Continue reading
Sometimes, when we feel upset about another person’s actions, we’re taking something personal that probably is not personal. A cardinal theme in cognitive therapy (what I do daily with people) is helping them challenge the idea that something is meant … Continue reading
“A message of hope.” I read this in headlines about the Pope’s recent visit. It made me think: How valuable is hope, really? I know that the absence of hope is a terrible thing. People become unhappy, full of despair … Continue reading
Professor of psychology and author Richard Wiseman: Unlucky people tend to be creatures of routine. They tend to take the same route to and from work and talk to the same types of people at parties. In contrast, many lucky … Continue reading
A colleague of mine who ran an outpatient substance abuse program once said to me, “Shame is the root of all these addiction problems. Scratch the surface, and you’ll find shame. And the problems created by the substance abuse just … Continue reading
Japan has one of the highest rates of suicide in the world, and it is the leading cause of death among those aged 15-39. More Japanese school pupils commit suicide on September 1 each year than on any other date, … Continue reading
“It is what it is.” I like this statement, when it’s used the right way. It suggests something that’s undeniably true. Things are what they are. Facts are stubborn things. People and objects are of a certain nature, and we … Continue reading
Just a few days ago, I was asked to write a column about heroism. Heroism of the sort displayed routinely by those in the military, police and elsewhere. And then the incident on the French train happened: Recounting how he … Continue reading
Do you notice how we say things can change our view of them? For example, just the other day I heard a parent say about his 13-year-old son, “He has anger issues.” What triggered the comment was an unexplained, and … Continue reading
I’m always saying that in psychology and daily life, philosophy matters — particularly ethics. Here’s an example to support my point. Psychotherapist Amy Morin, writing at psychologytoday.com, has a sensible article entitled, “5 Signs You’re Trying too Hard to Please … Continue reading
“He pushes my buttons.” “She knows how to manipulate me.” We’re all familiar with, and at some time have felt, these particular expressions. What do they actually mean? Emotions move us. (The Latin root of the word, “emotion,” literally means … Continue reading