It’s often hammered into our heads from childhood: “Money is the root of all evil,” or, “Money can’t buy happiness.” If that’s the case, then how come it’s such a major part of our lives? Couples fight over it so … Continue reading
Barely a day goes by when somebody doesn’t ask me if they should blame their parents for various problems that might have arisen in childhood. No matter what the specific issue, my response is always the same: You can hold … Continue reading
I received an interesting email from a Delaware Wave reader who asks, “I’m not sure I can give proper advice to my brother. He’s gay and really loves our parents, who are slightly religious but don’t practice. They’ve made anti-gay … Continue reading
Readers ask me if it’s possible to be a “rush-a-holic,” i.e., to be addicted to rushing or being in a hurry. I believe it is possible, but it’s not the rushing itself that holds the appeal. Some love the thrill … Continue reading
There’s been a lot of talk lately about loyalty. Some use the term correctly, and others simply use it as a tool to get what they want. I equate loyalty with integrity, i.e., consistency among your ideas, your principles and … Continue reading
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Love is not sacrifice. When you love someone, you want them to be happy. When someone loves you, you want them to do something for you because they want to, not … Continue reading
One of my faithful readers here at the Delaware Wave writes that he and his wife recently retired here at the beach. But in spite of that, he’s not happy. It doesn’t have to do with anything specific; things are … Continue reading
Contrary to what the drug companies would have you think, anxiety can sometimes be useful and necessary. Like, for example, when that anxiety triggers a call to sensible action. Let’s say you feel anxious at the sight of an oncoming … Continue reading
Fifty-four years ago when Grateful Dead guitarist Jerry Garcia wrote those words, he probably couldn’t have imagined they’d end up (slightly modified) as the title of a self-help column. In Delaware’s Sussex County, yet! Well, for those of you who … Continue reading
One of the biggest problems in relationships is the assumption that there’s a conflict of interest – when in fact, the partners have unnecessarily adopted an adversarial mindset. When I work with couples, I find myself saying over and over … Continue reading
We often hear the saying, “He pushes my buttons.” Or, “She knows how to manipulate me.” But what do these complaints really mean? Steven Stosny, Ph.D. at psychologytoday.com states that “Emotions move us.” Indeed, the Latin root of the word … Continue reading
I often warn my clients about believing arbitrary assertions. Sometimes it can be convenient to do so, but acting on something for which there are no facts to back it up can be psychologically unhealthy. Here’s an example excerpted from … Continue reading