No matter how hard you try, you can’t change another person. Even a trained psychotherapist can’t change somebody without their consent and effort. It is, however, still possible to influence others. But success presupposes that the subject is open to … Continue reading
It’s hard to believe, but (for those of you who are counting) this is my 400th weekly column for the Delaware Coast Press! Though you’d be hard pressed to find a nicer bunch of folks than their able staff, I’m … Continue reading
Is your romantic relationship smooth and effortless? Or is there a constant sense of “walking on eggshells” and trying not to offend the other? Over 30 years of clinical experience have convinced me that truly good relationships do not require … Continue reading
People often ask me about the virtue of loyalty. The mental health profession generally falls into line behind widely accepted virtues as a measure of mental health, so is loyalty in fact healthy, wise and good? Many people equate loyalty … Continue reading
One of the highlights of my week is the quiet morning when I sit down with a cup of coffee and confront my glowing computer screen. It stares blankly back at me, and I know what it wants: The first … Continue reading
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow said it best: “We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing, while others judge us by what we have already done.” And it works both ways! If you underestimate your potential, or if you ignore … Continue reading
John R. Schafer, Ph.D. writes on psychologytoday.com: “Changing negative first impressions is difficult. A person who forms a negative impression of another person will be less inclined to meet that person a second time because that person has been judged … Continue reading
I received several reader emails about my column from a few weeks ago where I wrote about an associate from my former practice in Washington, D.C. who likened resort dwellers to “outlaws.” I took it (and she meant it) as … Continue reading
Two approaches to life, especially in the business or professional environment, characterize most human interactions. The first is the adversarial mentality; the second is the realistic mentality. The adversarial mentality rests upon illogical but (to some people) emotionally appealing ideas … Continue reading
One of the silver linings around the otherwise dark cloud of summer’s end is the Labor Day Jazz Funeral just slightly south of Rehoboth on the Bethany Beach boardwalk. The New Orleans-style parade lays the season to rest, symbolically mourning … Continue reading
Clients often tell me about neighbors who drop in uninvited. Or children (or worse yet, adults) who can’t keep their hands off of your property. Do you have friends who call and expect you to be available to talk — … Continue reading
A local reader tells me that he has been unemployed for four years. He goes on to say, “My odds of finding a job seem to decrease as time passes. A friend has offered to compose a fake resume and … Continue reading