A reader asks: “Trust your gut. What the heck does that even mean? People seem to be saying this more and more. Does my gut have a brain?” Though the irony isn’t lost on me, what we call “our gut” … Continue reading →

According to research reported by theguardian.com, loneliness can have dramatic consequences on one’s health. Feeling isolated from others can disrupt sleep, raise blood pressure, lower immunity, increase depression, lower subjective well-being and increase the stress hormone cortisol (at sustained high … Continue reading →

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow wrote, “We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing, while others judge us by what we have already done.” Wise words, and they work both ways. For example, if you underestimate your potential, or if … Continue reading →

Interestingly enough, abandonment is a fairly common topic of conversation in the offices of helping professionals, physicians and others. Let’s take a closer look at what is meant by “abandonment issues.”  In general, it has to do with childhood experiences. … Continue reading →

Barely a day goes by that I don’t receive notes from readers asking how to discuss emotional issues rationally; politics in particular. One of the first tools I suggest it to ask questions. Don’t ask hostile questions; just honest, thoughtfully … Continue reading →

One of the subjects most often brought up with therapists, life coaches and even medical doctors is how to deal with toxic, psychologically damaging relationships. Kristen Fuller, M.D., writes: “I myself had all the tools to avoid a toxic relationship, … Continue reading →

It’s hard to make it through a day without hearing about “entitlement” – especially in a negative context. To be entitled simply means that one believes that he or she deserves something. A sense of entitlement can be valid, i.e., … Continue reading →

A “Life’s a Beach” reader asked me the difference between an “irrational” (her words) avoidance of people versus true and healthy solitude. To figure out what’s irrational, you have to back up and define what kinds of interactions with other … Continue reading →

We’ve all heard the phrase, “blaming the victim.” Normally, this expression applies when the actual victim of a crime is blamed for something he or she did not cause. Things have become so backwards in our crazy culture that we … Continue reading →

Over the years, I’ve seen many relationships that are not everything they could be.  Marriages routinely end in chronic dissatisfaction and divorce. More and more I see people treating one another poorly. I suspect that one reason for this mistaken … Continue reading →

It’s a rare couple I see that doesn’t end up interrupting one another when things get emotional in a session. Indeed, it’s no secret that being interrupted can be very annoying. Is it just rudeness? Or is it something more? … Continue reading →