When facing an important decision about relationships and other personal issues, it’s often best to consider your own advice first. After all, who’s better suited to know what’s right for you than … you? Recently, I spoke with a friend … Continue reading
Category: Life’s a Beach!
A Logical Mind Makes for Clear Memories
Memory problems are frustrating. People joke about “senior moments” while others worry about the possibility of dementia. Dementia is actually a disease of the brain, but normal memory ultimately has more to do with how you manage (or don’t manage) … Continue reading
Nobody Likes a Liar — Not Even a Liar
People sometimes ask me if clients lie to helping professionals. Though it seems kind of self-defeating — considering they’re paying for the sessions — I’ll admit that I’ve gotten pretty good at figuring out when somebody’s not telling the truth. … Continue reading
Telling People to Live in Reality is KIND — Not Mean!
I wrote a column recently where I suggested that how you feel is determined by how you think. A Delaware Wave reader emailed; asking if that concept doesn’t open the door to rationalization and fooling yourself. She wrote: “I have … Continue reading
Sloppy Thinking makes Decisions Difficult
I’ve always liked the old proverb, “If you don’t know where you’re going, any road will take you there.” And I always follow it up with something like, “So you’d better be ready for whatever might be down that road.” … Continue reading
Think for Yourself: The Essence of Self-Esteem
Far from being something mysterious, the power of suggestion is often a part of everyday life. For example, let’s say you mistakenly drink a caffeinated beverage close to bedtime, but don’t realize it until the next day. You’re surprised that … Continue reading
Affirmations, Sure. But Conviction & Inspiration Require Substance
From time to time clients will tell me that they like to read peppy little affirmations first thing in the morning. But interestingly enough, others tell me that these fluffy, hyperbolic one-size-fits-all sentences feel like nothing more than false hype … Continue reading
Can Friendship & Romantic Love Coexist?
A Delaware Wave reader asks if it’s possible to be just friends with somebody to whom you are attracted romantically, even if they don’t feel the same way. She goes on to ask if that can also apply to an … Continue reading
When Aversion to Noise Becomes an Extreme
Over the years I’ve encountered clients who tell me that certain sounds make them feel uncomfortable and annoyed. I even have a friend who sold his house and moved because constant traffic sounds kept him perpetually angry. A bit of … Continue reading
Is “Being Supportive” ALWAYS a Good Thing?
When dealing with others, it’s important to be careful about the way we phrase things. And “being nice” has nothing to do with it; the way we phrase things has an impact on how we view them, and sometimes it … Continue reading
It’s Not Healthy to Run from Conflict
Many people are under the impression that they can avoid trouble in their relationships by not arguing. They mistakenly assume that the absence of fighting – or any disagreement – is an indication that the relationship is healthy. But that … Continue reading
Train Yourself to Guard Against Pointless Anxiety
Contrary to what the drug companies would have you think, anxiety can sometimes be useful and necessary. Like, for example, when that anxiety triggers a call to sensible action. Let’s say you feel anxious at the sight of an oncoming … Continue reading