I want to know people I can respect, and I want to know people with whom I agree. Ultimately, the first matters more to me than the second. If I agree with people but cannot respect them — then who cares? … Continue reading
Category: Psychology & Self-Improvement
The Futility of Nagging

Nagging comes from anxiety. It’s based on a false belief that repetition will create motivation. It never does. In fact, it lowers respect for the one who nags. Nagging reveals weakness. It’s a way of confessing, “I have failed to … Continue reading
There Are No Mysteries

There is a good mental technique called ‘demystifying.’ The starting premise is: ‘There are no mysteries. There ARE unknowns, but the unknown can become knowable. The method is to break it down and figure out how.’ Demystifying lowers anxiety because … Continue reading
Shut Up and Think

In marital relationship problems, the most overlooked area of communication is listening. Most people assume listening is for the sake of the other partner. “Yeah, yeah, I should listen–for his [or her] sake.” That’s not it! Although your partner may … Continue reading
Self-Responsible Means Self Interested

Before you say, “I don’t have the time,” make sure to answer the question, “Do I MAKE the time?” You can “make time” in different ways. The most overlooked way is to CUT something you currently do in favor of … Continue reading
What Makes a Friend Supportive

Being a supportive friend doesn’t mean always agreeing with your friend. It means supporting that his mind reached a certain conclusion — or decision — and you respect him for it. You support a friend by respecting his mind, his … Continue reading
A Major Root Cause of Depression

A lot of the reason people underachieve — or even get depressed — is because of a false belief that there’s “something better.” Sometimes this false belief is in an afterlife. Only the most fervent believers can buy into this … Continue reading
Certainty, Uncertainty and Self-Esteem

People who are certain of nothing fail to appreciate the power of facts, reality and logic. People who are certain of everything likewise fail to appreciate the power of facts, reality and logic. Those who feel, “Who am I to … Continue reading
If You Please

Don’t make pleasing others your goal. Make pleasing yourself the goal. The people who really matter will be pleased that you did.
Approach to Life

Life isn’t about the elimination of fear or the eradication of sadness. It’s about the creation of value and purpose — about material and emotional fulfillment. If you eliminate fear without creating value — if that were even possible –you … Continue reading
The Psychology of Spending in Today’s “Economy”

Many people are cutting back on expenditures because of the current “economy.” In one sense, this is rational behavior, provided that the economic conditions are merely a reminder of what you should have been previously doing. But this isn’t the … Continue reading
The Meaning of “Self-Medication”

The biggest problem with “self-medication” is when it takes on a life of its own. Let’s say you drink, to self-medicate over anxiety about aspects of your life. Instead of thinking and doing something about those problems, you simply continue … Continue reading