It’s a rare moment when we don’t experience an emotion. But is it based in fact, or is it just a reaction (right or wrong) to some stimulus? When you experience an emotion, it’s important to identify it – but … Continue reading
Category: Life’s a Beach!
Don’t Waste your Time with Feel-Good Speak
The past few years have demonstrated that how we say things can change our view of them. For example, a parent recently told me that her son “has anger issues.” Her comment referred to an unexplained, and frankly rude, outburst … Continue reading
Solve Problems by Examining your Thinking
This may sound strange coming from someone who wrote some self-help books, but I’m perpetually disgusted with the majority of self-help babble in bookstores or worse yet on daytime TV. My gripe is with the emphasis on “how to.” “How … Continue reading
Five Hints to Make Your Second Career a Reality
A surprising number of newly retired people I see are stressed over what they’re going to do with themselves. Some tell me that they’re not qualified for the jobs they want, and others aren’t interested in the jobs for which … Continue reading
New Ways of Coping with Anorexia
Anorexia is generally defined as a pathological refusal to eat. According to Dr. Walter Kaye, professor of psychiatry at the University of Pittsburgh, people with anorexia use starvation as a way to self-medicate. Apparently, starvation prevents tryptophan, an amino acid … Continue reading
Compromise Isn’t the Only Answer
One of the subjects that couples almost always bring up in my office is how to make – or keep – a marriage happy. My first reaction is to remind them that they are on the same team; that they … Continue reading
Take a Closer Look at Nagging
Few things are more annoying than being nagged (except perhaps being accused of it). Nagging stems from the false belief that repetition creates motivation. It never does, and in fact, it lowers respect and reveals weakness by saying, in effect, … Continue reading
Try for Independence
A friend of mine sold his successful business and retired. In order to fill his spare time, he took a job in a small specialty store. Money was not really a factor, but the adjustment from “employer” to “employee” was … Continue reading
Does the Negative Matter More than the Positive?
Today’s culture of bad news and scandal has generated so many questions in my office. Basically, people ask me how they can keep from being cynical, but at the same time not be naïve in the face of negativity and … Continue reading
Do it Now. It’s Good for You.
So many people tell me that they often put off until tomorrow what they should have done today. For many, their procrastination is so bad that it causes stress in their jobs and in their personal lives. If this sounds … Continue reading
A Journal is Not a Diary; So What Is It?
For some, living at or visiting the beach can be a time for reflection. I call it “introspection”; a time for quiet exploration of your true feelings, wants and needs. When clients present to me with stress or frustration, I … Continue reading
The Search for Love
A question I hear almost daily in my office is what factors or behaviors can prevent one from finding a loving relationship. The answer boils down to a combination of reasons, the first of which is simply not searching persistently … Continue reading