Q: Considering the different degrees of lying, should you dissociate yourself with someone who white lies? My thought is the leap between white lying and all out major lies is very, very small. If a person will white lie to … Continue reading →

Is lying a mental disorder–or a choice? Lying is essentially a choice. However, it can become so ingrained and automatic that it no longer functions in the person’s mind—nor seems to outsiders—as a conscious choice. But it still started as … Continue reading →

Life isn’t just about rebellion or submission. There’s an alternative: It’s called thinking.

If you want loyalty from people, make sure to choose people who value the same things you do. People tend to be loyal to what matters to them. If you value the truth, and someone else values the truth, then … Continue reading →

I don’t understand the term “loser.” Life is not something you win or lose at. It’s not a game of chance. It’s something that you either make the most of, or that you squander. It’s something that you either engage … Continue reading →

Keeping your word matters to others, but even more to yourself. When you keep your word: Others will believe you; others will listen to you; others will help you in a crisis when you need their help; you can rest … Continue reading →

“People who trust in themselves and in their own merits are, as it were, blinded by their own ‘I,’ and their hearts harden in sin.” –Pope Benedict XVI My reply: It takes an “I” to cure cancer, to engage in … Continue reading →

“Everything happens for a reason” implies that Someone Else is governing all that happens in your life. However, choice is inescapable. It takes a choice to look at something as happening for a reason. Actually, it’s not that Someone Else … Continue reading →

Don’t worry about hurting a loved one’s feelings. Worry about creating a web of deceit. Because when you lie or mislead to “spare another’s feelings” it has the same consequences as lying and misleading for any other reason. And don’t … Continue reading →

In refusing to say NO to others, even though it’s the honest answer, you’re presumably doing it to protect them. Their interests require that you say YES, even though your own interests require that you say NO. Yet there’s a … Continue reading →

You have your challenges, and the people you care about have theirs. Everyone has them, because life is–among other things–a series of challenges to be conquered. You can be sensitive to the fact that a loved one has challenges as … Continue reading →

Q: Dr. Hurd, I have a question. A friend of mine really hurt and betrayed me, so I’m done with him. I won’t have any more contact with him. Another good friend of mine is friends with this former friend. … Continue reading →