A friend told me about an experience she had at a local fast-food eatery. While standing in line, she was engaged in conversation with an elderly friend who was seated. Their voices were somewhat raised due to the noise in … Continue reading
It’s a rare day when a client doesn’t ask me about bringing up kids to be responsible about money matters. I’m in the interesting position of having talked to hundreds of people about their childhoods while simultaneously observing how they … Continue reading
Regular readers of this column know that I have written over and over that love is not sacrifice. When you love someone, you want them to be happy. When someone loves you, you want them to do something for you … Continue reading
People often say to me, “Why am I feeling down? Why do I feel sorry for myself?” It’s a perfectly reasonable observation, but it doesn’t get to the heart of why some people cope better than others. The key to … Continue reading
A reader emails that her doctor wrote her a prescription for depression and tells her that it is a “disease.” But she feels that her problem is more emotional than medical, and she hates the way the pills make her … Continue reading
The Christmas holidays are barely over, and here we are, already staring at heart-shaped boxes of candy. We humans are imaginative creatures, and we’ve perfected a long list of reasons to eat excessively, over and above the boring reasons … … Continue reading
A reader asks if it’s possible to be just friends with somebody to whom you are attracted romantically, even if they don’t feel the same way. She goes on to ask if that can also apply to an ex-spouse or … Continue reading
In spite of constant media bombardment about “family” this and “family” that, there are many people out there who are single and maybe even live alone. Not every unattached person longs for companionship, but some out there do prefer to … Continue reading
Cell phones on the beach. Cell phones on the boardwalk. Cell phones in theaters, on the highway, in restaurants…. Why do people love cell phones so much? Or, from a more psychological point of view, why do people have such … Continue reading
When people come to see me, they’re often surprised when I suggest that one of our goals will be to help them think. By “think,” I mean trusting their senses, and then integrating reality into abstract conclusions. Rational thought is … Continue reading
People often ask me if older widowed people should remarry. The obvious answer is, of course, yes – if they want to. But many widows and widowers feel it’s disloyal to their late spouse, not to mention issues with wills, … Continue reading
People occasionally tell me that they don’t believe in psychotherapy. When I ask them to clarify, it often comes down to the mistaken idea that therapy requires “uncritical belief.” Sadly, that’s true of many things nowadays, but certainly not with … Continue reading