How often have we heard – or even said, “I need a drink! I’ve had a hard day. I need a nice big meal — or a cigarette!” In the face of stress, it can be tempting to self-medicate with … Continue reading
Category: Life’s a Beach!
The Positives and Perils of Vacation Mindset (DE Wave)
Well, it’s that time again. Every year for the past 10 years that I’ve had the pleasure of writing for this newspaper, I receive multiple emails (and this time, a couple of phone calls) asking me to reprint this article. … Continue reading
The Benefits of Deadlines (DE Coast Press)
I am pleased to report that I have been a part of the Delaware Wave and the Delaware Coast Press newspapers since June, 2005! I did a little math and discovered (somewhat to my horror) that the ensuing years translate … Continue reading
Alternatives to Nagging (DE Wave)
Few things are more annoying than being nagged (except perhaps being accused of it). Nagging stems from anxiety over the false belief that repetition creates motivation. It never does, and in fact, it lowers respect and reveals weakness by implying, … Continue reading
Those Delightful Contrarian Know-it-Alls (DE Coast Press)
Clients sometimes describe a spouse, family member or friend as “contrary.” In other words, the person constantly disagrees just for the sake of disagreeing. Such a person is often referred to as a “rationalist” (though “annoying” is a good alternative). … Continue reading
Irrational Fears + Magical Thinking = Trouble (DE Wave)
In my 30+ years talking to people professionally, I have discovered that most people’s fears are not rational, i.e., not based on facts. Most fear results in nothing more than avoidance just for the sake of avoidance. “If I avoid … Continue reading
You Can Buy a Lot of Things, But Not Self-Respect (DE Coast Press)
Will Rogers said: “Too many people spend money they haven’t earned, to buy things they don’t want, to impress people they don’t like.” And we know that it’s true. In my experience, much of this spending, buying and impressing comes … Continue reading
Friendships Can Be Seasonal (DE Wave)
Like an old friend who visits every so often, we’ve again said goodbye to the quiet season. Stress-free left turns and easy access to our favorite haunts are, at least for a while, things of the past. In the time … Continue reading
Make Your Relationships Real (DE Coast Press)
One of the biggest impediments to human associations is the unwillingness to say what you think and ask for what you want. Note the word “ask”; none of us are entitled to something from another person simply because we want … Continue reading
Exercise your Memory! (DE Wave)
My therapy office is exactly eleven steps from the waiting room. About a minute ago, I found myself standing out there; utterly clueless as to why I went in the first place. Whatever my perfectly good reason had been for … Continue reading
Kids and Divorce (DE Coast Press)
It’s the eternal question: When divorce becomes a possibility, is it better for parents to stay together for the sake of the kids, or separate in an attempt to find personal happiness? This real-life dilemma plays out for almost half … Continue reading
Help! Everything is Stressful! (DE Wave)
It’s easy to be stressed these days. Even the simple act of taking a vacation can cause anxiety. Though you might just be visiting, stress management skills still have to be developed and maintained. Taking the time to enjoy life’s … Continue reading