Dear Dr. Hurd, My mother is 89, lives alone, doesn’t drive, and is in pretty good health. Since she moved here, she has become very manipulative. She exaggerates her hearing and vision problems, and invents situations to get what she … Continue reading
Category: Life’s a Beach!
Show you care: Have an opinion! (DE Wave)
Is it a sign of true friendship to ignore a friend’s flaws? Not necessarily. If someone is your friend, doesn’t it make sense to try and stop her from making a mistake? You can’t control her or do her thinking … Continue reading
Can “single-think” become “couple-think?” (DE Coast Press)
I have a friend who has been single for years. She is attractive and popular. In spite of her independence, she very much hopes to one day be in a comfortable relationship, maybe even get married. A worthy goal, but … Continue reading
Don’t Confront. Interact and Educate! (DE Wave)
A visitor to Bethany Beach sent me an email where she tells me that her next-door neighbor freely allows her dogs to do their “business” on her lawn and driveway, and makes no effort to remove it. The writer feels … Continue reading
If you’re happy, then I’m happy. (DE Coast Press)
On this Valentine’s Day, it’s all about loving relationships. And one of the subjects that couples always bring up in my office is how to make – or keep – a marriage happy. My first reaction is to remind them … Continue reading
Who’s the Boss (DE Wave)
According to a study done by LinkedIn.com, three-quarters of employees dislike or hate their jobs because of the boss. Of course that makes for great little cartoons on Facebook, but let’s take a closer look: If you dislike your boss … Continue reading
Choosing a Therapist in Ten Easy Steps (DE Coast Press)
People often ask me how they can find an effective therapist in their area. Of course this gives me a great opportunity to promote my most recent book, “Bad Therapy, Good Therapy (And How to Tell the Difference).” Short of … Continue reading
You are not your past. (DE Wave)
Pop psychology loves to tout the purpose of therapy as “dealing with the past.” I suspect that at least part of that comes from the feel-good prattle that pervades Oprah, Ellen, and the rest of daytime TV’s vast wasteland. But … Continue reading
What It Means to “Overdo” Things (DE Coast Press)
We all know people who overdo things. Clients ask me about their loved ones and wonder if excessive habits such as smoking or drinking could open the door to something more harmful, like addiction. The essence of addiction is that … Continue reading
‘Emotional Pollution’ (DE Wave)
We all know at least one person who complains about pretty much everything. He or she has nothing good to say, and (gleefully) zeros in on other people’s weaknesses — real or exaggerated. I’ve learned from experience that people do … Continue reading
‘Blaming the Victim’: A Bizarre Twist (DE Coast Press)
We’ve all heard the phrase, “blaming the victim.” Normally, this expression applies when one party blames another — the actual victim — for something he or she did not cause. Things have become so backwards and upside down in our … Continue reading
Facebook, Social Media and the Psychology of Validation (DE Wave)
“Do you crave Facebook likes?” asks Martin Graff, Ph.D., in a recent article and study. People say it all the time: “The attention I get from social media is important to me,” or, “I consider someone to be popular based … Continue reading