Living in a resort can be interesting when, at season’s passing, it turns back into a small town. One of the most common complaints I hear is, “Everybody knows your business.” It’s certainly a widespread feeling, but not really accurate. … Continue reading
Category: Life’s a Beach!
Is Your Spouse Cheating? (DE Wave)
A reader sent me an email in reaction to my column a few weeks ago about jealousy and cheating. She writes, “I liked your article about being suspicious and jealous of your husband or wife, even though there’s no evidence … Continue reading
Is the Entitlement Mentality the New American Syndrome? (DE Coast Press)
In my many years of clinical experience I’ve seen many human relationships that are not everything they could be. Marriages routinely end in chronic dissatisfaction and eventually divorce. More and more I see people treating one another poorly. I suspect … Continue reading
“Look—but don’t touch!” The Psychology of Jealousy (DE Wave)
A woman I know admits that she constantly feels jealous and threatened by her boyfriend’s popularity with other people, especially women. She goes on to say that she tries to control her feelings, but nothing works. Even though she has … Continue reading
Is there an alternative to worrying? (DE Coast Press)
Recently, I posted a Peanuts cartoon on Facebook that said: “Worrying won’t stop the bad stuff from happening … it just stops you from enjoying the good.” The comments I received in reply to the post were even more interesting, … Continue reading
Blame & Shame Won’t Work (DE Wave)
Blame and shame are not healthy motivators. People sometimes try to motivate you with shaming and blaming, and sadly, these methods are such a part of daily life that most of us take them for granted AND tolerate them far … Continue reading
Beware the Entitlement Mentality (DE Coast Press)
It’s hard to make it through a day without hearing about “entitlement” – especially in a negative context. What does a sense of entitlement really mean? To be entitled to something means to feel or believe that you deserve it. … Continue reading
Solitude is Not the Same as Loneliness (DE Wave)
A Delaware Wave reader asked me the difference between an “irrational” (her words) avoidance of people versus true and healthy solitude. To figure out what’s irrational, you have to back up and define what kinds of interactions with other people … Continue reading
What to Expect in Your Marriage/Relationship (DE Coast Press)
Dear Dr. Hurd, I am a straight male who is attracted to a woman who is bisexual. She is also attracted to me. I want a committed, monogamous relationship, but am uneasy about making such a commitment with her because … Continue reading
Why Are Some People Self-Defeating? (DE Wave)
Dear Dr. Hurd: My brother is 32. He has never held a job a job for longer than a couple of weeks and he, his wife and daughter live with our mother. They scrape by on disability, food stamps and … Continue reading
When Self-Help Doesn’t Help (DE Coast Press)
This may sound strange coming from a therapist, but I’ve come to resent the self-help babble you find in the bookstore or worse yet on daytime TV. My gripe is with the emphasis on “how to”. “How to” feel better. … Continue reading
Figure Out Your Feelings and Then Control Them (DE Wave)
Regulars here at Life’s a Beach! know that I describe myself as a cognitive therapist. Has an impressive scientific ring, don’t you think? But aside from sounding official, just what is it? People ask me, “Cognitive therapy is all well … Continue reading