Barely a week goes by where somebody doesn’t ask me what mistake people make most often. Regular readers of this page can probably predict my answer: The biggest mistake people make is trying to control others. We can’t control the … Continue reading
Many people assume that mental health is a matter of either medicine or moral weakness. The medicine side assumes that pills can eradicate mental illness. The moral side assumes that troubling emotions stem from weakness of character. Neither side is … Continue reading
Around this time of year I often get questions about personal growth and how it changes relationships with friends, romantic partners and family. When people improve themselves in ways that increase their self-esteem and confidence, their relationships also change. I … Continue reading
A website visitor writes, “I have a friend who projects her shortcomings and personality faults onto others; holding them accountable for those actions or inactions. For example, she’s always late, yet she expresses anger when others are late. Why does … Continue reading
A website visitor tells me about her friend who is divorced from a man who was somewhat abusive. Her friend enjoys being with her new boyfriend because he is kind to her. However, the reader’s friend confides in her that … Continue reading
I received this email from a faithful follower of this column: “I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m a compulsive talker. My crazy need to say something or answer someone (even when no answer is required) often gets me into … Continue reading
A Delaware Wave reader emails that her relative, a young woman of 19, has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder. She asks if it is a valid diagnostic label or just another excuse to justify bad behavior. Psychiatrists define bipolar disorder … Continue reading
Parents of teenagers sometimes often tell me that they don’t feel appreciated by their kids. “Look at all I’ve done for them,” they say. “Why can’t they show gratitude?” As reasonable as this may seem, it contains a huge error. … Continue reading
A Delaware Coast Press reader emailed, “While preparing to have my first child, I did some research and resolved that I was going to breast feed. I couldn’t wait to share this momentous decision with my aunt, with whom I … Continue reading
“Many a truth is said in jest.” Sounds nice, but where does joking end, and emotional abuse begin? One of the most common complaints I hear about people from family members or friends is that, “She pretends that she’s joking, … Continue reading
A surprising number of newly retired people I see in my office are stressed over what they’re going to do with themselves. Some tell me that they’re not qualified for the jobs they want, and others aren’t interested in the … Continue reading
Today’s endless publicity about criminal acts is inevitably accompanied by some of the victims commenting publicly that they “hope someone will put the criminal on a better track.” In fact, research over the years has exposed the fallacy of such … Continue reading