Rarely does a day go by then somebody doesn’t say, “Can you help me?” Well, yes … and no. A good therapist can help you identify your beliefs, what behaviors you choose to exhibit, and whether those choices and beliefs … Continue reading
Depression, anxiety and anger management get a lot of press, but what about bitterness? Things seem to be looking up for the bitter among us: The American Psychiatric Association (APA) has considered classifying bitterness as a mental disorder. A statistic … Continue reading
A Delaware Wave reader writes that her father died almost 18 years ago. She considers herself fully recovered, but when something reminds her of him, the feelings come rushing back. She asks me if she needs medication to keep her … Continue reading
Events over the past few years have demonstrated that how we say things can change our view of them. For example, a parent recently told me that her son “has anger issues.” Her comment referred to an unexplained, and frankly … Continue reading
We’ve all heard the phrase, “blaming the victim.” Normally, this expression applies when one party blames another — the actual victim — for something he or she did not cause. Things have become so backwards in our crazy culture that … Continue reading
In an article on children, philosopher Stephen Hicks makes an interesting case against homework for school-aged kids. “Everyone says that they want children to grow up able to live independent lives and pursue their chosen careers passionately. But that aspiration … Continue reading
Avoiding confrontation at any cost is not the way to run a relationship. People tell me all the time about how their spouse/partner does things that bother them. I invariably ask: “Why are you telling me and not him (her)?” … Continue reading
Many people are under the impression that they can avoid trouble in their relationships by not arguing. They mistakenly assume that the absence of fighting – or any disagreement – is an indication that the relationship is healthy. But that … Continue reading
It’s a rare day when a client doesn’t ask me about kids and responsibility about money. I’m in the interesting position of having talked to thousands of people about their childhoods while simultaneously observing how they now live their adult … Continue reading
For many years, “conventional wisdom” (often not wisdom at all) has preached to us that suffering strengthens character. We nod wisely and walk away – while quietly wondering how that can possibly be the case. What suffering can actually do … Continue reading
In my 35+ years talking to people professionally, I have discovered that most people’s fears are not rational, i.e., not based on facts. Most fear results in nothing more than avoidance just for the sake of avoidance. “If I avoid … Continue reading
One of the most common questions I encounter in my office end up being about relationships. Couples often tell me that they don’t feel “connected,” or that their relationship failed because they were not “connected.” When I ask them what … Continue reading