A reader tells me that her 22-year-old son graduated from college last May and returned home to live. She loves having him here, but also realizes that he needs to get on with his life. In spite of the forest … Continue reading
As Mothers’ Day approaches, I get a surprising number of questions about whether older widowed people should remarry. The obvious answer is, of course, yes – if they want to. But some widows and widowers feel it’s disloyal to their … Continue reading
People often tell me that they feel used because someone gets something out of being with them. But wait … there’s nothing wrong with self-interest! Every relationship, whether business or personal, needs to be mutually beneficial. However, choosing to intentionally … Continue reading
A visitor to my website writes, “My wife of two years goes out of her way to control me. Everything from constant phone calls asking where I am, to ordering me to go to sleep when it suits her, or … Continue reading
How many times today will somebody ask you how you’re feeling? But is feeling good the primary goal of our human experience? Wait … before you turn the page, think about it: Does it always feel good to do the … Continue reading
Barely a day goes by when somebody doesn’t ask me if they should blame their parents for various problems that might have arisen in childhood. No matter what the specific issue, my response is always the same: You can hold … Continue reading
Over the years I’ve encountered clients who tell me that certain sounds make them feel uncomfortable and angry. A bit of research introduced me to the term “misophonia”: a debilitating situation where a “trigger stimulus” (some sort of sound) becomes … Continue reading
In spite of the fact that warmer weather is just around the corner, I still encounter people who feel depressed and gloomy not only through the winter but even as the promise of spring is within reach. This is often … Continue reading
TV sitcoms and movies are full of amusing portrayals of controlling mothers. Interestingly, many of the people who ask me serious questions on this subject are, in fact, mothers themselves, and they’re usually referring to experiences with their own mothers. … Continue reading
I love this quote from Will Rogers: “Too many people spend money they haven’t earned, to buy things they don’t want, to impress people they don’t like.” And it’s true – on many levels. In my experience, much of this … Continue reading
One of the questions I regularly encounter in my office is how a person can approach a loved one or a friend about their drinking without the loved one or friend going on the defensive. Years ago, one of those … Continue reading
A lot of people like to read peppy little affirmations first thing in the morning. But some clients tell me that fluffy, hyperbolic one-size-fits-all platitudes feel like nothing more than false hype. That annoyance can make it difficult to absorb … Continue reading