A reader sent me a comment about one of my columns where I suggested that the biggest mistake people make is to try to change others. She agrees that the choice of what to think and do will always be … Continue reading →

After doing therapy or life coaching with people for over 35 years, one can’t help but notice patterns. Problems may take different forms, but the core issues often fall into just a few categories. Life doesn’t need to be as … Continue reading →

It’s a rare moment when we don’t experience an emotion. But is it based in fact, or is it just a reaction (right or wrong) to some stimulus? When you experience an emotion, it’s important to identify it – but … Continue reading →

The past few years have demonstrated that how we say things can change our view of them. For example, a parent recently told me that her son “has anger issues.” Her comment referred to an unexplained, and frankly rude, outburst … Continue reading →

This may sound strange coming from someone who wrote some self-help books, but I’m perpetually disgusted with the majority of self-help babble in bookstores or worse yet on daytime TV. My gripe is with the emphasis on “how to.” “How … Continue reading →

A surprising number of newly retired people I see are stressed over what they’re going to do with themselves. Some tell me that they’re not qualified for the jobs they want, and others aren’t interested in the jobs for which … Continue reading →

Anorexia is generally defined as a pathological refusal to eat. According to Dr. Walter Kaye, professor of psychiatry at the University of Pittsburgh, people with anorexia use starvation as a way to self-medicate. Apparently, starvation prevents tryptophan, an amino acid … Continue reading →

One of the subjects that couples almost always bring up in my office is how to make – or keep – a marriage happy. My first reaction is to remind them that they are on the same team; that they … Continue reading →

Few things are more annoying than being nagged (except perhaps being accused of it). Nagging stems from the false belief that repetition creates motivation. It never does, and in fact, it lowers respect and reveals weakness by saying, in effect, … Continue reading →

A friend of mine sold his successful business and retired. In order to fill his spare time, he took a job in a small specialty store. Money was not really a factor, but the adjustment from “employer” to “employee” was … Continue reading →

Today’s culture of bad news and scandal has generated so many questions in my office. Basically, people ask me how they can keep from being cynical, but at the same time not be naïve in the face of negativity and … Continue reading →