So many people say to me, “Why is what I can’t have more appealing than what I can have?” The answer is easy: Wanting what you can’t have is the easy way out. In other words, fantasy is often preferable … Continue reading →

The wonderful ‘shoulder season’ is just around the corner! The weather is still great, but the crowds are (mostly) gone. Whether you’re a resident or just visiting, you probably came here because of a desire to take things slower. Why … Continue reading →

I regularly receive letters and emails asking me about post-traumatic stress disorder; predominately an issue for military personnel returning from active duty. While everybody agrees that some people certainly do suffer from PTSD, I’m often asked if others might be … Continue reading →

People often ask me, ‘What does a psychotherapist do? What happens in psychotherapy? The short answer is that we help people identify what’s bothering them about other people in their lives, and help them figure out how to change the … Continue reading →

One of the subjects that couples bring up in my office is how to make — or keep — a marriage happy for both parties. My first reaction is to remind them that they are on the same team; that … Continue reading →

Barely does a sitcom or TV talk show go by without the word ‘passive aggressive’ popping up. Despite its overuse, it is a very real behavior. Do any of these situations sound familiar? 1. A friend assures you that he’s … Continue reading →

After my third book, ‘Bad Therapy, Good Therapy (And How to Tell the Difference)’ went on sale, I received a number of emails asking if bad therapy is better than no therapy at all. My answer is ‘No.’ Good therapy … Continue reading →

I received an email from a reader who tells me that her best friend is unhappy in her marriage. She writes, ‘It really pains me to see her this way. I think she’s sort of looking for someone to tell … Continue reading →

It’s the peak of the season, and it’s doesn’t get much more crowded than this. But for some people, the thought of walking onto a crowded boardwalk or into a busy restaurant makes them nervous. If that’s sounds familiar to … Continue reading →

One of the biggest wastes of time in my office is working with a client who wants me to validate his or her irrational emotions. When I refuse to do that, they of course accuse me of ‘not caring about … Continue reading →

People often ask me to define cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) in simple terms. A great example of CBT at work can be viewed at an unlikely source: Chef Robert Irvine’s Food Network series, Restaurant Impossible. FoodTV.com describes the show as … Continue reading →

A reader from Ocean City writes that her new HOA president is just plain obnoxious. He barks orders like they’re in boot camp, talks WAY too much, and has taken to sending nasty letters for the slightest infraction (or what … Continue reading →