People often ask me if there is one primary rule for communication in a successful relationship. From my professional experience, I would say that the most overlooked area of communication is: Listening. People often assume that listening is for the … Continue reading
Each of us probably knows at least one person who deals with relationships and responsibilities in an “indirectly direct” way; failing to get things done — but always ready with an excuse. This type of personality is referred to as … Continue reading
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow wrote, “We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing, while others judge us by what we have already done.” Wise words, and they work both ways. For example, if you underestimate your potential, or if … Continue reading
A reader emails that her husband harps on her to moderate her drinking, smoking, eating, etc. She knows he loves her, but she worries that his concern for her health isn’t enough to motivate her. She tries to cut back, … Continue reading
I recently had a close encounter (of the obnoxious kind) in a local grocery store. Regular readers know that these little adventures of mine often end up as columns, and this one’s no exception. A woman who showed no evidence … Continue reading
The summer season will most probably be accompanied by get-togethers with family and friends. All that can be lots of fun, but it has its limits. It’s my nature to stand back and listen to people (it’s what I do…), … Continue reading
One of the dubious hallmarks of the summer season is the increase in police reports of petty shoplifting here in the Cape Region. The nationwide Police Foundation reports that shoplifting continues to be a major crime problem in spite of … Continue reading
The atrocities committed in Orlando last week have brought the issues of homosexuality and religion into the forefront. In the aftermath, I received an interesting email from a website visitor who asks, “I’m not sure I can give proper advice … Continue reading
My daily experience repeatedly debunks the myth that good relationships require constant work. Good relationships already work well, because each partner is getting what he or she wants. Anyone in a happy, mutually satisfying relationship will tell you that he … Continue reading
Dear Dr. Hurd, I’m the primary caretaker of my aging mother. My efforts and sadness are compounded by the fact that she is suffering from advanced Alzheimer’s. Unlike death, where you grieve and then in time return to your daily … Continue reading
Several readers asked me to clarify the difference between short-term compromise and all-out self-sacrifice when it comes to relationships. More than one Life’s a Beach! column has emphasized that the latter should never be part of any partnered relationship. A … Continue reading
According to research reported by theguardian.com, loneliness can have dramatic consequences on one’s health. Feeling isolated from others can disrupt sleep, raise blood pressure, lower immunity, increase depression, lower subjective well-being and increase the stress hormone cortisol (at sustained high … Continue reading