People often react badly when you say something they’d rather not hear. But it’s just as bad when you don’t say what they want to hear. The perfect example is an email I received from a reader: “Dear Dr. Hurd: … Continue reading
Category: Life’s a Beach!
Listen to Yourself (DE Wave)
When dealing with others, it’s important to be careful about the way we phrase things. And “being nice” has nothing to do with it; the way we phrase things has an impact on how we view them, and sometimes it … Continue reading
Your Life: It’s Either Your Own, or It Isn’t (DE Coast Press)
The mass shooting committed in Orlando last year brought the issues of homosexuality and religion into the forefront. In the aftermath, I received an interesting email from a website visitor who asks, “I’m not sure I can give proper advice … Continue reading
Excuse-Making Blocks Personal Improvement (DE Wave)
We’ve all heard that it’s wrong to make excuses. It’s a rare mental health professional who even talks about the issue, much less takes the position that excuses are bad. Other than myself, one of the few who has addressed … Continue reading
Be Successful AND Enjoy Life (DE Coast Press)
It’s easy to be stressed these days. Even the simple act of taking a vacation can cause anxiety. No matter what you are doing, stress management skills still have to be developed and maintained. Taking the time to enjoy life’s … Continue reading
Healthy Escapes? Not So Much (DE Wave)
How often have we heard – or even said – “I need a drink! I’ve had a hard day. I need a nice big meal — or a cigarette!” In the face of stress, it can be tempting to self-medicate … Continue reading
To Thine Own Self … (DE Coast Press)
A Delaware Coast Press reader writes that a long-time acquaintance recently passed away. The upshot is that most of the people she knew didn’t like the woman who died. She was obnoxious, and spread bad rumors about everyone. The reader … Continue reading
Toxic Humor (DE Wave)
“Many a truth is said in jest.” But where does joking end, and emotional abuse begin? One of the most common complaints I hear about people from family members or friends is that, “He pretends that he’s joking, but I … Continue reading
You’ll Never “Catch Up” (DE Coast Press)
The new year often brings people into my office who tell me that they feel like they’re never going to get “caught up.” They’re always worrying about how (and when) they’re going to achieve all the goals they’ve set for … Continue reading
Not Everybody Welcomes Change (DE Wave)
Around this time of year I often get questions about personal growth and how it changes relationships with friends, romantic partners and family. When people improve themselves in ways that increase their self-esteem and confidence, their relationships also change. Every … Continue reading
Who’s Pushing Your Buttons? (DE Coast Press)
We all know somebody who says, “He pushes my buttons.” Or “She knows how to manipulate me.” But what do these complaints actually mean? Steven Stosny, Ph.D. at psychologytoday.com [8-14-15] states that “Emotions move us.” Indeed, the Latin root of … Continue reading
Make Your Own Luck (DE Wave)
New Year’s Day is just a memory, and I hope you consumed your share of black-eyed peas and turnip greens. Each portion is purported to bring financial luck in the coming year. The proof for all this apparently lies in … Continue reading