‘I’m gonna go on a diet at exactly 12:01am January 1!’ ‘I’m gonna join a health club, first thing on New Year’s Day!’ ‘I’m gonna get myself organized in the New Year!’ ‘I’m gonna ‘ I’m gonna’.’ How many New … Continue reading
Category: Life’s a Beach!
Can the Internet Cure Loneliness?
In spite of the media’s relentless holiday jingling and jangling, we all know that there are still people out there who are single and maybe even live alone. Not every unattached person longs for companionship, of course, but there are … Continue reading
A Shortcut to Nowhere
Addiction is a controversial subject, bogged down in political correctness and ‘feel-good’ labels. But, like it or not, America is an addictive society, and many of us have addictions to something. My definition of addiction has grown out of more … Continue reading
How to Avoid “Victim-Think”
Rarely does a dinner party or social occasion go by that somebody doesn’t ask me what a psychotherapist does, and what actually happens behind the closed doors of a therapy session. After I resist the urge to mumble something about … Continue reading
Diets don’t work
Well, it’s that time again. Sugar cookies, eggnog, mashed potatoes, gravy, eggnog, homemade pastries, lots of snacks, eggnog ‘ you get the idea: The holiday eating frenzy is upon us. How can one possibly lose weight, much less maintain it, … Continue reading
Actions have consequences
When people come to see me for psychotherapy or life coaching, they’re often surprised when I suggest that one of our goals will be to help them think. By ‘think,’ I mean trusting their senses and then integrating reality into … Continue reading
Controlling doesn’t work
As the holidays (and increased interaction with family and friends) approach, one topic that sometimes comes up is the issue of control. The squabbles, tension and hurt feelings that often result from the behaviors of a controlling person are testament … Continue reading
Self-Reliance Equals Self-Esteem
You might recall reading about the recent deaths of three people at a self-help seminar in Sedona, Arizona. The seminar consisted of a ‘spiritual awakening’ event at a sweat lodge. A woman who took part in the ceremony told The … Continue reading
Take Care of Yourself First
A reader sent an email telling me that she feels ‘used’ by her friends and family. She wasn’t clear on the details, but I have found that some people think they’re being used just because someone gets something out of … Continue reading
Perk up your memory
My therapy office is exactly eleven steps from the waiting room. About a minute ago, I found myself standing out there — utterly clueless as to WHY I went in the first place. Whatever my perfectly good reason had been … Continue reading
The Second Time Around
People often ask me if older widowed people should remarry. The obvious answer is yes, of course, if they want to. But sometimes it’s not so easy. Many widows and widowers feel it’s disloyal to their late spouse, and those … Continue reading
What Therapy Isn’t
There are many myths involving what actually happens in a therapy session. I think that some people actually believe all that feel-good nonsense they see on daytime TV talk shows, and expect their visit to be an instant cure for … Continue reading