People often ask: How much time is reasonable for me to focus on my past, in therapy or otherwise? The answer isn’t quantitative. The answer is simply: As much time as you need, in order to understand what went wrong, what role if any you played in it, so you can then move on. The past will only engulf you if you have no plan for the present, and for the near future. If you have a coherent plan for yourself, your mind will go back to the past, at times, and then return home to the present again. Without that coherent plan of action for today, tomorrow, the next day — and next year — your mind will not have a home to which to return.